Do Your Spawnlings Wear Sunglasses?

sunglasses-featureI wear sunglasses all the time. Seriously, every day. Take a look at my profile picture. The spawnlings each have their own pair as well. However, shopping for sunglasses is a tiring exercise.

I recently did a review on some sunglasses over on GeekMom. Yes, I scored some freebies for it (perks of blogging). To be completely honest, I was really wary about any sunglasses purchased online. Remember, I am of the bespectacled species; pretty much useless if my prescripted lenses are even slightly out.

I also grew up in Northern Australia. Sunglasses are part of the uniform when you cross the border. And if the sunglasses aren’t meeting the grade, it will cost you big time in headaches, eyestrain, and a bunch of other health factors.

The idea of buying sunglasses online was as appealing as shopping in person–which I hate.

The thing is, how do you know you’re buying quality before you hand over your cash? You look for reviews of people who truly put something to the same testing you would.

And yes. My spawnlings like to destroy things.

So here’s the review for you again, in a more “Evil Genius Mum” standard. Again, you can read the full review over at GeekMom, with full costs and links; I’m just expanding upon the testing and suitability for each spawnling.

For the energetic 3-year-old honey badger

Zaltu is three years of pure energy (like a lot of three-year-olds), inspired and motivated by her older brothers. She’ll give anything a go, because “she don’t care!” Zaltu is not a stereotype; she likes all bold colours, surfing the waves with her dad, racing in Mario Kart with her mum, pulling out the DC Superhero Girls dolls, and dreams of being an astronaut. Generally, she likes the idea of sunglasses, but they never stay long on her face because they tend to interfere with whatever chaos ensues.

These Julbo Booba sunglasses have been an absolute hit. Zaltu loves wearing them everywhere. And yes, I do mean everywhere.zaltus-sunglasses

The sunglasses look good. They have bright bold colours with soft enough arms to rest easily on her head. Zaltu has a big head like her mother. We recently learnt Zaltu’s glasses fit an 8-year-old friend. True fact. I was a tad nervous about stretching them, but the sunglasses flexed really well.

The quality of the lenses is fantastic: plastic category-3 lenses, designed for full UV protection. These sunglasses are the genuine product, cutting out the glare so prevalent on both the beach and the ski slopes. And the added wrap-around feature is a boon to both light-leak and fitting on the head.zaltu-julbo-sunglasses

They are also fairly scratch-resistant. Zaltu throws these things everywhere. Yet they come up a lot better than the scratch-resistance I paid for with my sunglasses. They have survived the sandy beach and easily cleaned up afterwards. I’m not sure exactly what they have done, but these sunglasses have completely survived the Summer Holidays of a three-year-old. They are good.

For the experimenting 7-year-old scientist

Nefarious is the scientist, with the curiosity for why things happen (and how to make it go “BOOM!” again). He is the one to think outside the box and push things to the limits.nefarious-sunglasses-polaroid

Aesthetically, the style is a little more “classic cool” with bolder colours to choose from. They are the perfect transition point between the high-energy fun of the Julbos and the more conservative frames for the older kids. These frames are a harder plastic but not so hard as to stick into a kid’s head.

The good thing about the harder plastic frames: they have survived tree climbing, being sat on by Sinister, and a short but effective game of tug-o-war with Zaltu. The frames have a small amount of flex to the structure, but not so much to bounce out a lens.

Of course, Nefarious loved the reflective lenses because they hide his eyes. Yes, I did explain to him about the practicality of the lenses, but he didn’t care. He is seven. He just loves rolling his eyes at me behind those shades.nefarious-polaroid-sunglasses

Only downside: they don’t wrap around and stop the light leak on the side. However, Nefarious says he hates that style. So clearly this is my issue, and I should be grateful he has sunnies he is willing to wear.

For the smooth 10-year-old chilling out

Sinister is the more subtle of the three spawnlings. While he loves to be the class clown, he only likes the attention if he is in control of it. At heart, he is quite conservative and deep-in-thought. Sinister is the one to sit back and watch you from behind his sunglasses, playing out a million and one scenarios in his head.sinisters-sunglasses

Again, smooth, classic style but in a colour variant he likes. These are the hardest plastic of all the frames. There is no flex in the arms whatsoever. The true test of comfort: Sinister is still wearing these on top of his sunburnt nose and there is no pain.

Like his brother, Sinister also likes the mirrored lenses. He also appreciates the single colour scheme, as he feels a little more ‘grown-up’. What I did notice with this pair is that the frames are ever so slightly curved to the face. Even though they are not fitted, they do provide a bit more protection to the eyes on the sides.sinister-sunglasses

See those water droplets in the photo above? No watermark. Not sure exactly what special feature that is, but from a prescripted lens point of view (who hates any smudge or scratch on her glasses) this is AMAZING. What kind of dark magic is this?!? And how do I score some!!

Each of these sunglasses survived the Spawnling Test Zone; buried at the beach, thrown across the room, sat on by older brothers, running through water features, spinning around and around on a spinning teacup. The worst they seem to have is a slightly loose screw in one arm on Zaltu’s sunglasses, which is easily fixed at any glasses shop or with your own tiny screwdriver at home. I wear glasses all the time and a loose screw is nothing new in this family… or in our glasses.

I’m still stunned by how easy it was. Vision Direct is an Australian website, and they deliver anywhere in the world. They provided me with the kids’ sunglasses for reviews, and now I am so impressed I am going back to them for my own prescripted sunglasses (at my own expense).

The hardest part of the whole process was probably measuring Zaltu’s face for her glasses—have you recently asked a three-year-old to stand still for 10 seconds?

Too Many Monkeys in the Political Circus

It is going to be a long day, while the world waits for the outcome of the US election. 

It’s easy enough if you’re outside the US to claim “not my circus, not my monkeys”, but let’s be honest. The President of the United States is pretty influential over the rest of the planet. Whatever the outcome, those monkeys are flinging poo at all of us. 

And while I’m eagerly listening out for updates, I am SAHP with EG Zaltu as well. I need a distraction from checking the interwebs every 5min.

So, Zaltu pulled out Too Many Monkeys, a kids tabletop game that seems highly relevant to today. 


Too Many Monkeys is a card game from Game Wright, for 2-6 players. The box says for ages 6yo+, but Zaltu hands me my butt regularly in this game. If they can count, they’ll pick up all the other cards fairly quick. 

Each player starts with six cards face down. They take it in turns drawing cards, looking for the monkeys. When you find a numbered monkey, you substitute it for the face-down card in the equivalent position in front of you. 


There are other cards to help or hinder; Wild Orang Utans are the wild cards and can move around your cards as required, giraffes and elephants are trying to join the party, raccoons raid the trash for any monkeys you need, Skip cards are the bane of my gameplay, and Do Not Disturb can turn any card face down again. 


At the beginning of each round, the winner of the last round removes one card from their face-down collection. Eventually players work their way down to one card, and the Monkey Champion!

It’s a great game for spawnlings, from 3yo Zaltu up to 10yo Sinister and even grumpy Ol’ EG Mum.

And if nothing else, it gives me a happier distraction while I wait for the other monkeys to sort their s….tuff out.


Have a close look at the box and you’ll see the wear-and-tear that comes from years of love and use. This was a gift from friends almost 5 years ago. It has travelled to Borneo, Queensland, and New Zealand. No payment or sponsorship for this one!!

If you like the game reviews, stay tuned–I have just returned from PAX Aust and have some awesome games to share very soon!

Forensic Friday: Our Dinosaur Project

It seems ‘world creating’ has become a thing in the EG Lair.

It all started with Sinister building his own terrarium for a school project last term (which he scored 93%… Such a good little evil genius…) – 3 months later and it is still going strong, without any further interaction. Not bad for a 9yo.

This type of experiment started us thinking: “why not incorporate some other real-life elements in our plays?”

And thus the Dinosaur Project began.


The Dinosaur Project

All of our elements were already around the home, but you can pick them up from your nearest shops for a fairly reasonable cost:

  • A large pot
  • Enough soil to fill it
  • One or two plants – we chose two dwarf palms as they look like plants from a prehistoric era, plus they were left-overs from Sinister’s terrarium
  • One large styrofoam cone
  • One plastic container – like a takeaway container
  • A dozen or so small toy dinosaurs
  • Paint – brown, red, and blue

What did we do:

  1. Fill the pot with the soil – ours was already full, but did require some weeding.
  2. Paint the inside of your plastic container blue – you don’t have to but it did add to the aesthetics.
  3. Snap the top off the styrofoam cone. Don’t be too worried about neatness; you want it to be a little rough. You’re painting the sides brown, and the top red – Look! It’s a volcano!
  4. While you wait for the paint to dry, kick in to the gardening with your plants.
  5. Now you can add your volcano and your primordial swamp. I think we can do more with the swamp/lake but we can do that another day. In the meantime… RAWR!!!

Zaltu is loving this little play area. She is really into the role-playing side, but I also noticed how quickly she picked up the carnivore / herbivore discussion we had earlier.

I would consider the Dinosaur Project a success. Now we are thinking of other ‘world creating’ play areas we can make!! 

Any suggestions?

One Children’s Shoe at a Time

In case you missed the Public Safety Announcement, Zaltu is 18mths old. Those with kids know that this is when the crazy shit happens. The term “terrible twos” is misleading – it all starts at 18mths.

But this time – surprisingly, it wasn’t Zaltu’s fault. At all. It was me, who almost shoved a delicate little wedge-heel sandal up the right nostril of a young sales assistant before setting the laser-armed sharks on her. 

Really, I would have been doing society a favour.

I started out with a simple request for some sandals for our 18mth old Spawnling. Zaltu was with me, and quite clearly being an 18mth old (read: playing with her Batgirl doll).



I kid you not.

But it gets better.

When I pointed out to her that Zaltu was 18mths old and wants to wear sandals while running around in the park with her brothers, the response was:

Oh, she can learn to run in these!

Now, like any EG Parent, I truly dream of at least one of my spawnlings being The Chosen One, and learning to run in high-heel kick-ass boots like Buffy (boys too).

But not at 18mths old.

Of course, when I told EG Dad about this shopping experience, he agreed that the wedges were a ridiculous suggestion for Zaltu.

These are more her style:

#batarangstowear

Side note: we didn’t find any sandals, but Zaltu fell in love with these runners:



And now I can’t catch her. Maybe the wedges aren’t such a bad idea…

EG Mum v “The Baking Mum”

Well. Good to know where I stand, Zaltu.

The minute Sinister and Nefarious are dropped at school, Zaltu knows it is her time.

Parks are visited, pigeons are tormented, EG Senior Citizens are wooed.

When we arrived at the playground, Zaltu made friends with another toddler. A toddler who had … Biscuits. Yeah!!

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And not just any biscuits. Jam drops.

Google it.

I was so proud of my Little Miss Opportunity.

Until it was time to go.

“Okay, kiddo. Time to go home!”

So, Zaltu waved goodbye to me. Okay.

Then walks over to the other kid’s mum. The Baking Mum.

Zaltu walked over to The Baking Mum and took her hand. She took The Baking Mum by the hand and started walking out the park, towards home.

Clearly, she had made her choice.

Obviously, I need to get back to the kitchen.

Hey, Baking Mum! I see your Jam Drops and raise you Chocolate Chewbaccas.

Stay tuned.

EG Parent Award #52

I’m sitting here watching Zaltu eat her lunch with Aquaman’s Trident.
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Yes, I did give her a fork. But why on Earth would she want a mere fork, when she can use Aquaman’s Trident?

Which of course led to me googling Batman Cutlery. Because why would you settle for Aquaman’s Trident when you could have Batman cutlery?

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But would you believe it, I only found one that actually fit the bill. And it is very witty.

So I give you: EG Parent Award # 52:

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Thankyou to mrparis over on Flickr.

However, Sinister says this set doesn’t quite cut it (ho ho!) and wants to buy Zaltu this set instead:

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In the meantime, I think she liked the Trident. And I dare you to take it off her.

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