Forensic Friday 4.5 – Non-cook play dough recipe 

Normally, we have blue sky – sunshine, lollipops and rainbows and everything. Well, you get the idea. Lovely weather. The type of weather that entices you towards world domination … If it just wasn’t so damn cruise in your high wing-backed chair…

But not today. No, today is day 3 of having EG Dad home sick and I’m over it. Sure , yeah, “oh poor guy! Here let me take care of you like the other spawnlings!” 

So, to entertain Zaltu away from EG Dad’s man-flu, let’s make PLAY DOUGH!!





The best part about this is no standing at the stove cooking it. Yes, i have done a post about this before, but a change in circumstances (read: chaos) led me to look for an even EASIER recipe. Do you any idea how much trouble Zaltu can get up to while I stand cooking something like play dough?!? It took all of 10 secs to climb over our ground floor balcony to jump to the park next door. When she was 12mths old. She’s now 18mths old. I’m not ready for this.

So how to make it:

  1. Mix the flour, salt, Cream of Tartar (what is this stuff anyway, besides essential for play dough), and oil together in a bowl.. 
  2. Add the food colouring to the boiling water and then gradually add to the “dry mix”. Mix around until it combines (we split the mix for 2 colours – red and blue)
  3. Let it cool a bit, then knead the crap out it, until it is smooth and malleable like minions, I mean play dough. 
  4. Then go and play. Simple, ja? Oh yeah, and keep it in an air-tight container.

No guarantee on your crew, but this bought me 15mins of “drinking my tea in peace” time. Worth it’s weight in Tim Tams, and then some.

Now excuse me while I go and check on the glowing mucous that is trying to escape the virus-riddled host I call a husband. This is starting to look more and more like a biology prac gone wrong. 

EG Parent Award #51

Hmm. Been awhile. Again.

Well, when you have the choice between blog and sleep – ZZZZZZZZZZ

Since EG Lair became a crucible for mixing together every fraking childhood illness in the immediate area, sleep has become that rare commodity I would ransom the moon for.

At first, I was stunned about how many different illnesses the spawnlings brought home: gastro, chicken pox, hand foot mouth, school sores, chest infection, sinus infection. It just keeps going. And every other parent was telling me that this normal with school age spawnlings.

Well none of them are damn geniuses.

The problem is not the little Petri dish of school, however. Though, that germ factory is not completely innocent.

The problem is with other adults who have no concept of the personal space of children

I almost wish I had ugly kids.

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See, on the walk to school pick-up, Zaltu was approached TWICE in her pram by complete strangers.

Apparently, it’s a social norm for strange women to just walk up to a pram and punch or rub babies’ faces, without asking.

But it’s not a social norm for mothers of said babies to rip off said strangers’ arms and beat them around their heads with the bloody stump?!?

I did point out to both “You don’t want to do that. She has Chicken Pox.”

One of them even replied “Why didn’t you tell me?!?”

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The thing is, adults spend all day telling kids to cover their mouths when they cough; blow your nose; wash your hands. But I see adults doing the same things all the time – and then touching other people like there is nothing wrong. I totally believe that half of the illness Zaltu’s had this year is from the grown- up minions who won’t leave her the frak alone!!

But one dear minion (Traci) has an idea.

“Whenever you’re out, give the kid something to eat. My fave is a Cheddar Scroll. Not too bad for the kid, but just messy enough to keep the crazies at bay.”

So we tried it – and it worked!! Genius!!

Traci – you rock. And to the next stranger who approaches my Spawnling without permission or invite – a pox on BOTH your houses!

EG Parent Award #50

To be an EG Parent, you have to stay one step ahead of the spawnlings.

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Sometimes it helps to build upon your experiences with Evil Genius siblings.

Now, I have already shared with you my own sibling shitheadedness here however this week’s champ has definitely upped the ante. She brings a whole new level of crazy evil genius to the party – and this wisdom should be treated with the respect it deserves. Cherish it, for it will give insight to the machinations of your spawnlings.

Introducing: How to be a Domestic Disgrace.

My favourite is #4:

4. Walkie Talkies – My parents bought Rob and I a walkie talkie set for Christmas one year in the hopes that it might foster a loving sibling bond. I mainly used mine to inform him that he was a wanker from various hiding places.

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Now go and say hi. Carefully. From a distance.

No eye contact. That’s a live one, we have there.

EGP Award #48

Being an Evil Genius Parent is hard work.

And sometimes, it’s the EG Parenting part that wears you out. Constantly thinking of entertainment that doesn’t lead to scorched earth and decontamination suits.

So Award #48 (because let’s face it – my weekly updates have been a bit outside of … weekly) is aimed squarely at what we need to regain our creative EG Parent juices.

And it’s a trip to Taiwan.

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This came up on my radar via Raising Geeklings, but it was Huff Post who caught my attention with this description.

There Is A Batman Hotel Room Out There, And It’s Only $50 To Stay …

Ok, so it’s not really a hotel… it’s a motel.

And it’s not really $50 per night… it’s $50 for three hours.

Yeah, it’s one of those motel rooms. *grin*

At first I thought, yeah – the spawnlings would love that, even for 3 hours.

Then EG Dad reminded me – babysitter for 3hrs is so worth it.

What would be your ideal geeky motel room?

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EGP Award #47 – Stan Lee

To be an Evil Genius, parent or otherwise, you need vision.

You need to be able to predict the future, by understanding human behaviour and knowing how to manipulate them. As a parent, this is ESPECIALLY important. Think back to all the times your mum busted you just as you were finishing the last knot tying your sister to the bed head…

No? That was just me?

That’s what makes me Evil Genius Mum.

And that’s what makes Stan Lee, Stan “The Man” Lee.

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EG Inc met with this strapping young man at Supa Nova on the weekend. He’s 91 – and far more quick-witted than many my age, let alone his.

More on Supa Nova later.

Anywho, Sinister and Nefarious had the opportunity to ask a few questions:

Who’s your favourite, after Spiderman? Can’t choose but has a soft spot for Dr Strange

Do you still read comics? Not as much as he wants to

If you could say anything to DC about their movies, what would it be?

Well, they will never be as good as Marvel. But there is one thing that would give them a boost – give me a cameo. No one would believe it until they could see it. That’s how our Marvel Movies make all their money – with me!!

What’s your favourite movie? Loves Iron Man but really enjoyed his cameo in the Spider-Man reboot

At this point, Stan turned to me and said “you guys are doing a great job parenting. Long day, but your three look like they’re still having fun. Are you teaching them all about comics?”

Of course, Stan. There’s so much fun in that!

“Good. That keeps my empire going for another generation.

And THAT, minions, is how you become an Evil Genius. Create something so damn awesome, it spans generations.

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* Evil Genius Mum – Stan Lee approved

Evil Genius Parent Award #45

The greatest parenting advice ever given to me was from EG Opa:

Make sure your kids believe you are capable of anything.

An-ny-thing.

Coming from a man with a State Champ Black Belt in Karate, I definitely believed he could do anything. Protector and chief strategist; I know he would fight to the death for me, while stealthy ninja stalking my last donut.

Sneaky bastard.

But this latest EGP Award recipient goes one better. It’s clear this parent “knows people” – people who can take care of it.

People like … The Tooth Fairy

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This TF means business.

Of course, we already knew you don’t mess with the Tooth Fairy. But hey – things just got real.

I like their style.