Evil Genius Parent Tool #8 – Reading

Do you read bedtime stories with your kids?

You are an Evil Genius Parent, setting your spawnlings up with an unfair advantage and must be stopped!!

Apparently. *shrug* meh

Look, we’ve had many people harping about the benefits of reading

Obvious Man by Wiley

But recently some one let ALL the crazies out of the Hotel.

It started a couple of weeks ago when I read a Canadian article about a bus company banning books on school buses. I shit you not. I was all ready to write an article about the danger of books and so glad that the world was realising this finally!

Books as weapons

I mean, seriously? We can’t possibly put seat belts on buses, but BOOKS!! BOOKS!! READING IS THE WEAPON OF THE EVIL GENIUS TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! (So you finally caught on).

And then I wake up to this news: A British Academic thinks that reading bedtime stories to your children gives them an unfair advantage over other children, and must be considered in your moral values as a parent.

Hell yeah, it’s an advantage!! That’s the whole fracking point of Evil Genius Parenting! To give your kids as many advantages as possible! If they are unfair like this, then BONUS POINTS!

But what about the parents who read for quality time with their kids? Or for the opportunity to share some cultural heritage with the next generation? Or… now sit down for this… what about the parents and kids who actually like to read?

SUCKERS!! Don’t you realise that parenting is all about the race to have the best cardboard cut-out at graduation?!?

Of course, Mr Swift back-peddled heavily after this comment – he doesn’t want to throw away reading with kids (though I would LOVE to see Mem Fox go all Possum Magic on his professor cap for that one).

Instead, he wants you to seriously consider the impact your reading is having on your child’s future and the impact on all kids who aren’t as lucky as yours. Because, y’know, your parenting should be dictated by every other child AND NOT the one in your actual care.

*sigh*

Seriously folks, go read a book to your kids. If we truly want our spawnlings to take over the world (and probably save it too) then we need to lift up the quality of their lives – not drag them down to mundane commonality. Inspire them to want more. Ride the dragons through their imaginations and instead chain the boring Knights of Conservatism to their Cliffs of Same. It is not merely intellect that carries the next generation forward – it is their imagination and their compassion.

And they are going to find more of that in bedtime stories than anywhere else.

2 thoughts on “Evil Genius Parent Tool #8 – Reading

  1. I just read an article that said reading TO your kids, even after they are quite capable of reading for themselves is even better than listening to them read to you. Something about setting an example of good pronunciation, emphasis, pauses etc. Whaaa? I’d just started trying to convince my daughter that I should get to lie in bed while she reads me a nice bedtime story and now she’s pointing to this article saying I should be the one reading to her. I mean, come on – I’m tired at the end of the day and I like having a story read to me too right?

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