Evil Genius Parent Award #22

Ssssshhhhhh.

Last week was locked up in the Evil Genius dungeon.

This week isn’t looking much better.

My attempts at meteor-collision with Earth failed.

EG Dad is being all understanding and compassionate.

And even the spawnlings’ teachers are telling me how fantastic, mature, and responsible they are at school/preschool. With sincerity.

DanaeI think my world is falling apart. I think I need some cuddle time with my Danae T-shirt on the couch.

But what’s a girl to do when she hits that couch?

Enter: Random Ramblings of a Stay at Home Mum.

AKA – Lori. Fellow Evil Parent – who’s evil this week is in the simple beauty of encouraging another parent (read: ME) to sit on her arse and eat something sinfully delicious.

Not evil enough for you? I don’t care. I have my feet up, in my Danae pink-heart-and-skull t-shirt, watching replays of Jennifer Lawrence falling up stairs, and eating chocolate Philly frosting straight from the tub.

Ooooooooh. You know what? I reckon I can feel my EG-ness coming back. Slowly. Might need another tub.

RRSAHMCheck out Lori at RRSAHM. She’s an awesome parent – has her moments of being amazingly cool to her kids, and then does something so ridiculously evil that I almost love her. Almost. Evil Genius’ don’t love.

Well. Except for chocolate. And World Domination. (now say that again in a Miss Congeniality voice).

What’s your re-boot treat? Straight single-malt scotch? Dark chocolate dipped strawberries? Making fun of Oscar dresses (that’s a bit easy at times). 

Evil Genius Parent Award #21

I promised you a great award this week and I *usually* deliver on my promises. Most times.

At least I am this time.

This special award is this week awarded to Shae’s Mum. Shae is a blogger over at Free Range in Suburbia. Shae is pretty cool and has some very creative ideas to bring out the evil genius in  both her parenting and her spawnlings.

But last week, Shae shared a beautiful story of exactly where she gets her ‘evil genius parenting’ from – and possibly any chance of melodrama-gene in her kids.

Now, anyone out there have a drama-queen spawnling? Want to know a great way to deal with their hypochondria?

Shae – Unfortunately not the EGP Award recipient. More like the EGP Award Victim.

 

“One time I was complaining of feeling unwell and Mum said that my hypochondria must have been flaring up.

My ears pricked up. Oooooh! I have a legit illness!”

 

For the full re-telling, read Shae’s fantastic blog post here.

Shae also has a Facebook page and is on Twitter with some funny tidbits. Head over and say hi from me. Do it now. 

BTW: Shae’s mum is visiting Shae this week. There’s gotta be some more juicy tidbits coming up. Bring it on!!

 

Has your parent ever used EG parenting on you? Share your most embarrassing and/or hilarious moment here!! Best story wins a blanky to hide under. 

Evil Genius Parent Award #20

You are all pathetic.

Seriously – are you on your best behaviour this week or what? I haven’t heard of a single example of awesome evil parenting all week. Given, I’ve been sick – but C’MON!! You all REEK with potential. Now get your butts and do something about it.

*sigh* In the meantime, I’ve at least been given an example of evil genius in a child, so that you know what you’re in for with your own spawnlings.

This lovely story comes from Dominique F., long-time friend and fan of EG Mum. So she should be.

Now Dominique has her own style of evil genius, and I swear this has only been cultivated by her family. This particular story is a perfect example, and why you should be very careful how you word things around potential Evil Genius Spawnlings…IMG_2424

Way back when Dominique was around 4 or so, she was learning to write her own name (a bit like Nefarious at the moment). It was the same time that her older sister was also writing her own name everywhere.

Now Grandad, in his infinite wisdom (rest his soul) had told Big Sis not to write her name on the wall – because then he will know it is her and she will be in trouble. Big Sis, in her OWN infinite wisdom, then shared this warning with Dominique.

Later that day, Grandad walks in to find Big Sis’ name scrawled across the wall. Of course, Big Sis is brought in front of Judge and Jury and chastised accordingly, despite her please of innocence. Grandad responds with “Well who else would have done it? Dominique?”

Hmmmm…

Just to prove a point to Big Sis, Grandad proceeds to ask Dominique if she wrote on the wall.

“Yep.”

What?! Well, why did you write Big Sis’ name?

“Because you said if I wrote my own name, you would know it was me and I would be in trouble. This way, I’m not in trouble.”

Can’t argue with that logic.

Rest assured, Dominique is not an Evil Genius Parent. She’s worse.

She’s an Evil Genius Aunt.

Now get with the Evil Genius Parenting!!